Seriously, until the day before 21st December 2012, I don’t feel a thing about this ‘Doomsday Theory’. First of all, it’s mainly because I believe in the Bible verse that told us that no one, not even the Son knows the end time. Secondly, I also believe that like what the scholars said, the Mayans have different mindsets than us when they did the calculation. The Mayans had intended to ‘prove’ that the world would be just like how it was, even after 7000 years, based on their calculation. That’s optimistic.
On the contrary, we are looking, or rather in search of the doomsday even since the early 19th century. I still remember in the year 1999, everyone were talking about The Millennium. And there were predictions like the ‘bugs’ (computer bugs) were going to paralyse the world because the computer simply cannot recognise the date of being reset back to 00. Well, heck! I admit I was slightly concerned at that time, because it was the time I got my very first Acer laptop using my very first salary, so I was worried that my laptop was going to fry and my money burnt.
This phenomena is just getting me to think. Why are we so obsessed about the end day? Among all the doomsday movies, I have watched “Armageddon” 3 times, and I cried all three times. I think it was not because it was the end of the world that causes me to shed tears, I always cried when Bruce Willis tore his badge to be given to the Captain who couldn’t join the voyage and pushed Ben Affleck into the shuttle to be sent back to Earth while he remained on the meteor to activate the detonator. I think I cried because Bruce Willis showed that he would be my perfect dad, and I know I could never have one, that’s why I cried. 😛 The other doomsday movies, I like the special effects, period.
Even if we know the exact time or maybe we have a day or two to spare before Armageddon, what difference does it make? I think the main reason is fear. We fear the Judgment; whether you are a believer or not. We know we are not ready. We spend too much time on the earthly things, we haven’t done up our ‘report’ for the Almighty. You know, this doomsday thing only got me to finally put a stop to my sluggishness. Yea, I think my boss might have been right when he said that I’ve slowed down a lot.
I think I have been wandering and just, giving up. I have actually made up my mind to be just be an ordinary teacher and waited for my pay to increase gradually as I aged. Then I will retire and maybe paint (not to make anything out of it), write (not to make anything out of it), and just do nothing. I mean, I will still manage all my obligations, but I think I will do nothing more.
I just want to be an ordinary person.
When I say this, it often brings my mind back to the year I was in Form 5. My best friend told me after writing my autograph that I am always so energetic, enthusiastic. And we talked about future. She was seeing a boy friend for 2 years already and she told me she probably would finish university then get married and have kids, she just want to be an average person. I told her that would never be me. I want to do something great ~
Many have interpreted the Mayan’s calculation to be a new start. It’s like year 2000 the Millennium. The clock just restart and it just signifies the start of another cycle anew. It’s not the end. I think I like this version the best. If it’s a restart, maybe I really need to wake up and do something. When I was in Vatican Museum listening to my guide’s explanation on the Michelangelo’s frescoes in the Sistine Chapel, my guide told us that Michelangelo completed the fresco on the wall of Sistine Chapel (The Last Judgment) at the age of 60. And she added, “Nothing is too late!”
I guess she was right.
It’s more of a state of mind. I no longer draft a checklist like I did when I was 17 – the 50 things I must do before I die, but I think I am now clear of where does this winding path leading to. This enlightenment, hopefully will bring me to another new height in my life. I just have to tell myself, “Nothing is too late.”